Help, My Thighs Are Swelling!

How's this for 5-year-old optimism? The other day, Ben said to me, “Mom your belly is getting so small. It’s just getting smaller and smaller and smaller! Pretty soon it will be this [makes tiny circle with fingers] small!"

Ssshhh! Don’t tell Ben that my stomach is bigger now than it’s ever been, postpartum or otherwise. Don’t point out that it protrudes further than my boobs, or that I haven’t lost one pound since giving birth. In fact, I’ve gained five pounds. Let's not even talk about my thighs.

I’m going to eat some celery sticks now ...