Fine, McDonald’s, Have It Your Way

I’m breaking up with McDonald’s. People who knew me in my 20s would never believe that I was even going out with McDonald’s. But it's true. It started with a French fry or side salad here, a grilled chicken sandwich there. It progressed to a Big ‘N Tasty with a large fry and a soda.

Before I had kids, I scoffed at parents buying small children Happy Meals, I admit it. Now I have a 30 lb bag of these toys in my basement, which I pull out from time to time when I want my kids to just. leave. me. alone. (Usually while I’m on the phone with a teacher, doctor or cruise line reservation desk, which I call sometimes just to pretend.)

Ten years ago, I was a vegan eating organic, drinking no coffee, eating nothing deep fried and shopping at Bread & Circus. I was a nutritional Puritan.

I lasted a while after Ben’s birth, too. He never ate meat until he was a toddler. I continued cooking complicated vegetarian meals. For snacks he’d have three different food groups, whereas now he’s lucky if he gets one. Now I realize the boys have been choosing from their candy bags more than once a day, and we’ve been visiting the golden arches sometimes twice a week. How did this happen?

It’s just so freaking easy, that’s how. I'm just so freaking lazy. And busy. Pull in the drive-thru and -- presto! -- you have a “meal” the kids will eat. They don’t call it a “Happy Meal” for nothing, apparently. I could have gotten a salad but the allure of the Big ‘N Tasty proved to much for me to resist. I repeat: HOW DID THIS HAPPEN TO ME?

Last week I posted a news story about McDonald’s at DotMoms, and many astute readers reminded me that eating at McDonald’s is the nutritional equivilant of licking the dumpster behind the local Motel 6. (At least, the way we eat at McDonald’s is.) One of the things that pisses me off about McDonald’s is they COULD offer more healthful food. They COULD bake the damned chicken nuggets. They COULD offer a vegetarian sandwich. They COULD give a shit about the health of the millions of people who, sadly, rely on them, who eat their because it’s affordable and convenient. But they don’t.

So here and now, I’m breaking it off with McDonald’s. I’ve pulled out my dusty vegetarian and healthy cookbooks. And so far, so good. Monday we had peanutty spiral noodles, last night, pasta a faglio with chard. Tonight, we're having sage roasted turkey breast with orange pan sauce.

I used to be a vegetarian, a health nut, a cook. I'm making a comeback. And I'm off to order Fast Food Nation from Netflix.