Week of Giveaways, Day 3: Bratz, Genie Magic

You may be wondering why I would pimp Bratz merchandise on my blog. Was it the allure of having the UPS guy stop by my house? Do I need contact with fit, male grown ups that badly? Maybe I like hearing the doorbell ring, his voice calling, "Package!" from the front lawn, the growl of his brown box of a truck peeling off the curb. *falls into daydream*

OK, here's how it happened:

1. Receive an email from a PR firm. Although Bratz is in the subject line, I open it. I scroll down and see the offer of a review copy of the new Bratz CD, Genie Magic. I think, "No thanks," and close the email. Bratz are too racy: too much makeup, bared midriffs, porn star looks. They make Barbie look wholesome. On the CD cover, they're all collagen-lipped, with one of them sticking her butt out at me. However, a halo sits atop the word "Bratz." Hmmm...

2. Remember the Bratz Valentines that Ben received from some Kindergarten classmates. Their moms seem normal. And my great neice had Bratz stuff at her 5th birthday party. Maybe I'm a Bratz snob.

3. Go to Amazon and look it up. Many positive reviews, just a few bad. "Positive lyrics," "funky beat," blah blah blah.

4. Decide, who am I to judge? Perhaps Bratz are a beneign pop culture phenom, targeted to "tweens," but favored by the younger 5-to-8 set. Wonder why "tweens" became a word. I mean, these kids bear the label "pre-pubescent." Can't we give them a cooler name? Like, for example, grade-schooler or nine-year-old or child. I can't imagine myself in conversation saying, "Oh, Ben's doing great. He's a tween now."

5. Accept the offer.

6. Receive not one but two copies, from the Post Office. Damn.

7. Pop the CD into the kitchen player at about 4pm yesterday. Brace myself. Wind and rain kept my boys cooped inside the last two days, and they're edgy. The first song is "Me & My Girls." Girls this, girls that. I expect Ben to revolt against so much "girl," but he doesn't notice. (I carefully hid the CD from their view.)

8. John lasts about 8 minutes before demanding that I "turn that music off right now." But that's good for him. At his assessment this week, his preschool teacher told me he told everyone to "STOP SINGING that song!! at circle time. I told her he's done that to me since he could talk, and before that he cried in protest. She had no comment.

9. Recognize a few riffs from other classic songs, one by TLC. Recall the days when parents bought their tween girls Bad Girls, by Donna Summer. At least mine did. They even let me "perform" it in the living room all day without encroaching on my space. And look at me! No harm done! This stuff is tame in comparison. Plus Bad Girls is classic. This, clearly, is not.

10. Dance with Ava. Enjoy then get annoyed by the repetitive beat. Make it to song 4 then turn it off.

11. Hope that some of my readers want the new Bratz Genie Magic CD for their daughter or relative or friend's daughter, because they sent me two copies.

12. Write this post.

13. Updated: The next morning, John sees the CD jacket and asks what it is. I tell him it's the music I played yesterday. He says, "I really didn't like that music, Mama. It sounded like girly music."

The end.

Want to win Bratz Genie Magic? Leave a comment between now and Sunday at midnight, EST. I'll draw a name on Monday.