Tonight's story may fall in the "had to be there" category. Also, "too much information" and "let's hope a potential employer never reads this." More than anything, though, it belongs in "Oh, shit, it's 9:45 Saturday night and I haven't posted yet." This was bound to happen. I will pay for this in google search results.
Wednesday midmorning, mom in the downstairs bathroom, sitting on the toilet, chin in hand. Toddler leaning on her right leg, ripping toilet paper and lunging to flush the toilet.
The door bursts open. Her preschooler bounds in and stands next to her right leg.
John: I have to poop, Mom.
Kris: Go upstairs.
John: I can't, I have to go now.
Kris: OK, give me a second.
Mom makes quick work of ending bathroom session. Resourceful toddler notes her distraction amd grabs the Big Interesting Basket, pulling it off the table. Mom shouts inappropriate expletive and stands.
Kris: Ava, no!
John: Groans. Aw, Mom! Your butt.
Kris: Hurries toward door, pulling up her pants, guiding toddler.
John: I'm not looking at your butt, mom. I'm not looking at your butt. Mom?
Kris: Yes, John.
John: I'm not looking at your butt ...
Kris: OK. I got ya. Turns and sees preschooler frozen in place, nose scrunched in disgust, eyes squeezed shut with a finger planted over each, for added security against seeing THAT again.
John: I'm not looking. Why are you laughing? What's so funny? Mom, next time I won't see your butt. Why are you laughing!?
3 comments:
Too funny. Although, it could have been so much worse --just thinking about some interesting observations a friend's little boy insisted on loudly making in front of company after catching his mom off guard in the bathroom.
hahaha that's funny...I think hearing a little boy say butt is funny. I dont think I ever heard a kid say butt before but I'm new to the parenting thing. Just yesterday was my THIRD TIME IN THE FAMILY ROOM IN THE MALL! I couldn't believe the tiny toilet bowl in there!
Hahaha, that's funny! But I sure appreciate a little boy who really doesn't look when he says he won't look. =)
Btw, I posted your Dr. Seuss cookbook conversation with John on my blog a couple of days ago. =)
Enjoy the rest of your weekend, Kris.
Sunnyday
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