I have nursed in bathrooms, in cars, and in the living room at family gatherings. I've also nursed in the dining room of crowded restaurants, freestyle, without draping a 10x10 canapy over myself.
Of the three venues, I prefer the latter, despite any stares or gasps that I missed because I didn't care what anyone thought. I was feeding my baby. Get a life.
I'm glad that no one ever asked me to stop nursing in public. I'm glad not to have an assault conviction on my permanent record, because I think that's how I would've reacted. With violence.
Oh c'mon! Wouldn't a pacifier jammed up the offender's nose be fantastic? Then an insincere offer to squirt some breast milk up there to help it heal? Let's chalk it up to the "mama bear response."
Here's a picture of my first baby, Ben, nursing at two weeks old:
I would really like to flash you all. However, being flat chested, my entire boob is in the child's mouth when I nurse.
This photo was taken in 2000. At the time, Breastfeeding.com hosted a photo contest, and I entered this photo fully expecting to win. I thought it was the cutest, most beautiful image ever captured on earth, amen.
Looking at it now, I can see the harsh lighting, the unfortunate red-and-yellow Boppy, and that big shadow on the left. Also, Ben's hair looks greasy, probably from my inability to stop running my hands over it. The photo reminds me that Ben looked like a 50-year-old man, hairwise, for his first year of life.
In all, this photo's not an award winner. But, oh, how I swoon, even today. Those knuckles, that button nose, that grapefruit-sized head. His eyes get me the most, the way they look straight up into mine, counting on me for sustenance, for love, for everything. Counting on me to feed him when he's hungry, and not make him wait until we get home, or to the (filthy, disgusting) restrooms, or to the parking lot.
In the end, all the things wrong with this photo don't matter, because Ben's the star. And, in this "debate," the flashing of a nipple doesn't matter. The prudishness of restaurant patrons and the lack of braincells possessed by MySpace administraters don't matter, either. All that matters is the baby, the mom, and their freedom to be out and about, to function in the world just like everyone else does.
There are times when the rights of the many trump the rights of the individual. Does that apply here? Hmmm, let's see: moms feeding hungry babies/toddlers vs. annoying people harrassing said moms.
No contest, right?
What I'd like to know is, when do we start arresting these anoying people?
Tags: breastfeeding in public, League of Maternal Justice, Breast Fest
5 comments:
Your post hit a chord with me today.
I have the luxury of working at one of the top ten hospitals in the nation, but I am disgusted to find that they have neglected their lactating employees.
My first baby is seven months old and I am still pumping four times a day at work (oh, the agony).
You would think that working in the healthcare industry, my employer would be supportive and offer appropriate facilities. Unfortunately, I have spent many days pumping in restrooms and most recently, a storage room covered in drywall dust after my dept moved to a new facility. When I asked our construction department about the possibility of adding a lactation room in our building, I encountered such hostility that I had no choice other than to email the CEO.
I'm happy to say that there is now a project underway to provide lacation facilities in every building to serve our 30,000+ employees.
I never thought I would be a breastfeeding activist, but I simply can't sit back and listen to a construction manager tell me that this is not a priority. If employees were forced to use portable toilets while waiting for restrooms to be made available months later, I can assure you that would be on the evening news.
Sorry I hijacked your blog, but I suppose I just needed to vent!
I have nursed my son at restaurants, at the library, at church, at Starbucks, and in Sam's Club. I'm really hoping that someone will throw us out someday so I can sue them and payoff my mortgage. Then I wouldn't have to work anymore and I could stay home and nurse all day...
Dawn: Great point about employers -- a huge part of this problem. When I had to pump at work, I pumped in a huge open space that was in being renovated! I can't believe I did that looking back now. I had a key, but who's to say other people didn't have keys, also? What if some construction guy came walking in?
The other troubling thing is that only 21 states have laws specifically excluding nursing mothers from public indecency laws. Amazing.
Hi Chris
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I'm still nursing at 7 months, and we love you Kris. Your post "All Gone" inspired me to keep breastfeeding my baby around 3 months! Even in this post you made me LOL!! "Also, Ben's hair looks greasy, probably from my inability to stop running my hands over it." LOL!!
A friend of ours was told she couldn't nurse at church "because there are some of the men here are struggling with lust."
Um, ewwwww.
It's sad that nursing mothers and their children get held hostage to the perversions of society.
Our family is fortunate that my wife has a semi-private room to feed our daughter in at lunchtime. And we're lucky that we have not (yet) had to argue with some lunatic who decides he's responsible for enforcing the messed-up mores of a boobophobic society.
There's little more important for a child's development than breastmilk. And we all need to fight to protect the right of moms to do this.
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